Truly (inspired by Persuasion) chapter Twelve: "Borrowed and Blue"

Chapter Twelve

Borrowed and Blue

Something old brings something new… Confessions of a Post-teenage Hermit

     Reeling, I spent that evening looking after Melissa’s twins. Helping others is good therapy. Besides, I couldn’t get out of it. When Melissa arrived home at midnight, she started complaining and hardly bothered to thank me as usual. I’ll admit, I couldn’t wait to get away from her. The babies had barely stopped crying for hours and I was exhausted. They had settled finally just before my sister returned.

     “Aren’t you going to stay and have some tea with me?” She asked innocently.

     “I have to go home,” I said. “Dad and Liz are expecting me for breakfast.” Another lie.

     It was not the longest drive from Venice Beach to Bel Air and there was very little traffic at midnight. Once again, the journey gave me time to think. I always did my best thinking on the road. I thought back to how Ben and I had parted - badly.

     “Are you sure this is what you want?”

    “Yes, no, I mean, I have to take notice of my family. They only want what’s best for both of us.”

     The voices became less distant, a remembered conversation, that last time I’d seen Ben.

    “I don’t understand, he said. I mean, I get it. You’re refusing my offer. We’ve been through a lot. You lost your best friend but don’t you think we deserve to be happy? Jenny would have wanted you to be happy.”  

    “I only think we should wait.”

    “But why wait?  You know I love you, you love me.”

    “I can’t go against my family’s wishes. My father has asked me to wait until I finish college. He thinks Missy made a mistake and doesn’t believe in rushed marriages. It’s hard… to go against him. He raised me.”

    “You mean, it would make life difficult if you don’t do what he wants? What sort of father is he if he doesn’t want you to be happy?”

    “He does, he just wants me to wait. And my Godmother agrees and so do my sisters.”

    “Your sisters are jealous. As for your father, maybe he’s right? Maybe we should wait until I have...more money, better connections – isn’t that what he means?”

    “I…I don’t know, I mean...”

    “Isn’t that what you mean?”

    “No. Of course not. You’re putting words into my mouth.”

    “Oh, I know how this works. They make it hard for us, make us wait for a few years by which time you’ve finished college at which point a line of rich, inbred males with familiar surnames are paraded around before you so you can choose the right husband – one your father approves of.”

    “That’s not it at all, you know there will never be anyone but you… we might only be young but you are the love of my life, Ben.” 

    “I wish I could say the same but you are so easily…”

    “What?”

    “Persuaded.  You don’t seem to know your own mind.  Perhaps it’s better if we take this time apart while I go to college and you finish school and make it permanent...”

     “What? What? No! I love you, I told you I just want to wait for you...”

     As he turned from me he walked down the hallway and out into the brightness of day. I had the strangest feeling it would be a long time before I saw his face again.

TRULY (inspired by Jane Austen's Persuasion) chapter thirteen: "Domestic chaos"

Chapter Thirteen

Domestic Chaos

A castle in Bel Air full of hopes, dreams and financial scandal…  Confessions of a Post-teenage Hermit

    By dinner time my Father was seated in his study, overlooking the infinity pool. From his floor length windows we had an entire view of the sweep of Los Angeles, hills in the distance, lights twinkling in the dark. It was an amazing sight, even welcome, I had to admit.

    “A fighter pilot, did you say, Liz?”

    “Not yet, Dad. He just graduated as an officer in the Air Force. He doesn’t have his wings yet, but he will. His sister’s family are renting the place.”

    “His sister? How thoughtful. Of course, it all sounds good but being a pilot is one of the more dangerous occupations in the world.”

    “Actually Dad,” Liz added as if I wasn’t in the room, “plane travel is safer than car.”

    My father shrugged as if to say he didn’t think so.   

    “Apparently his sister’s husband is working in LA over the summer. Her show is on hiatus and with a small child and a baby on the way, he wanted to do something vacation wise with the family for the summer. Apparently money is no object as he didn’t hesitate over the deposit…”

   I listened to them talk on until it finally dawned on me after further questioning, that they were barely aware of my presence as I sat on the couch reading a magazine.

   My father prided himself on his former career as a litigator until he became so rich from inheritances and investments that he’d given up practising but was busily reading the newspaper on the internet to keep abreast of all his old associates and their various crimes and cases. I’d woken for breakfast and was hovering in the hallway as Melissa arrived, depositing a baby in my arms.

    “I’ve decided to come over for breakfast. Fred is at home with the other one. We had an argument.”

    “Oh,” I said.

    “Missy?” Dad asked gruffly, looking up from above his glasses.

    “Hi Dad.”

    “Liz and I are so happy you’ve come to stay,” he said unsmilingly. “All my daughters are here for breakfast. What a treat,” he added.

    It didn’t take him long before he criticized me.

   “Jane? You’re looking pale and withdrawn. Haven’t you been getting enough sun?”

   “I’ve been teaching and not at the beach dad,” I said with exasperation.

   He could barely hide his distain.

   “Ah, yes, teaching. When are you going to give me some more grandchildren? Elizabeth is simply devoted to her career, but you, Jane, I once had high hopes for you. Teaching is fine but Wentworths marry well or become lawyers, although the two are not mutually exclusive.”

   “Yes, dad,” I said absently. I was barely listening as I poured my coffee but I knew agreeing was the easiest option. 

    Dad barely listened to me as usual but since we were both older now he paid me lip service. By “marrying well” my father meant marrying not just money but connections. I was fed up with his pathetic snobbery and wondered why I endured the weekly torture of family dinners. I had no choice now I was under his roof again as I had no savings of my own.  I was beginning to consider my Godmother’s offer of a loan. How else would I make my escape?

    “Are you seeing anyone, Jane?” Melissa asked as she looked up from her fashion magazine whilst the new nanny took care of her baby. Melissa was dressed in designer clothes. Fred was on his team building exercise that weekend but Liz had confided to me, that he and Melissa were having “trouble.”

    So, here we were: this highly dysfunctional co-dependant family, attempting to “communicate.” 

    I know, everyone deserves better, but they were mine. And I was theirs. It always bothered me deep down that I knew it was not possible to love and love weakly. That kind of love was not love, just need. I fulfilled some need in my sisters as they did me. As for my father, well, he was just plain difficult. Yet I grew up in a cocoon and was assured my parents and sisters were devoted to the family unit. Perhaps that was true, and there was love and loyalty, of a sort.

     I had no influence in my own family. Having neither a suitable career – meaning, highly paid and prestigious – nor a suitable husband (meaning the same), meant my views were meaningless. In my family, love without money didn’t rate. Some family, I know. Terrible value system, I know that also. Yet, they were mine. Even though we all sat in separate parts of the kitchen to eat breakfast (Dad was at the head of the table reading the newspaper), we shared a kind of love. If it’s possible to love and love weakly, or maybe it was just familiarity mixed with loyalty. Yes, that’s what my family were. They bickered and criticized in private, but publicly, we stood up for each other – mostly. 

    “Oh, Jane,” Melissa said as she ate some toast, “put something decent on, you can go and choose anything you like from Elizabeth’s closet; I’m sure she won’t mind.”

    “In a moment, Melissa.” I changed the subject, “I’ve gone over the accounts Dad,” I said mildly.

    “That wasn’t necessary, Jane. Melissa already did it,” he said as he turned to the legal section of his paper.

    “Melissa’s accountancy skills are one of the reasons we are in this mess…”

    “There’s no need to place blame, dear, we are all in this together….”

     Melissa ignored our conversation and looked up from her toast again to ask, “Haven’t you changed your clothes yet, Jane? I wish you’d stop boring us all with constant talk of money.” 

     I cleared my throat and continued, “… as I was saying, if everyone tightens up a bit with their spending we mightn’t have to sell the Bel Air house.”

    My father grunted as he spoke, “Jane, there is no way I’m selling this place. I haven’t even contemplated it. I’d sell your car before I’d do that.”

   “Dad, you can’t do that.”

   “Why not?”

   “It’s a rental.”   

   “Oh,” he replied unapologetically. “Well, never mind, you’ll be able to buy one soon.”

    I shook my head as I finished my coffee and walked upstairs to do as I was told. I was searching through Liz’s closet when I heard the gate from next door swing open and noticed Eleanor walking along the path that connected our houses. I’d forgotten Eleanor had been invited for brunch. 

     My Godmother lived in the vast estate that bordered ours and had decided to bring over a homemade dessert as a welcome gift for me. Even though Eleanor had been alone since her husband left, she had already remarried (and divorced again) and had no romantic inclinations towards my father whatsoever. She had a huge business fortune and a clothing line to oversee and those interests kept her busy. The fact that she and my father had never dated (nor ever would, as they were cousins), made their alliance even stronger. Basically, Eleanor had so much money from her first husband that she didn’t ever envisage sharing it again with a new husband.

    By the time Eleanor arrived at our door, I’d seen the news on my cell phone, an attachment about Ben that Keira had sent me. I’d run upstairs to read it, although Melissa was relieved I was seeking “a change of clothing.”

     I kicked my shoes off and flung myself on Elizabeth’s bed to hide from my family and finish reading the article.

     I couldn’t express how I felt as I read the words, returning home town hero. Apparently, Ben had invented some kind of computer programme that could change the world of aviation. Some huge software company had bought it. This meant Ben wouldn’t ever have to work again. I knew he’d never choose to take the easy path though. He’d always dreamed of being in the Air Force.  

     I flung my cell on the floor and myself on my sister’s bed. Minutes later I heard a voice.

     “Jane, what is it?” Eleanor asked.

TRULY (inspired by Persuasion) chapter fourteen: "More Advice"

Chapter Fourteen

More Advice

There was something about my Godmother. Though she could be snobbish, she’d always believed in me, always been a friend to me. My Godmother thought I was worth the very best. Suddenly, I was having some issues with the bad advice I’d received years ago even though it had originated from the desire to do good… Confessions of a Post-teenage Hermit

      Eleanor was standing at the foot of Elizabeth’s bed, just as she used to do when I came home from school to an empty house after my Mom had gone to the East Coast.  

     “It’s the new tenants at the Beach House. I’m worried.”

     “Oh, I’m sure the house is in good hands, Jane. You’ll be able to have it back some day. You know I offered to give your father some money but he refuses to take it. I’m offering you the same, Jane. I would never see you want for anything. It could be a loan, but I’d rather it be a gift.”

     I dried my eyes.

    “Thank you Eleanor, I know. But we could never accept it. My father got us into this and I’m trying to get us out. On paper, we’ve lost almost everything … except this… mansion. We’re in so much debt. I’ve been going over the family accounts with our financial advisors. My sisters and father are about to get a wake-up call especially in relation to their unlimited credit cards.” 

    Eleanor paused a moment.

    “But that’s not why you are crying, is it, Jane?”

    I shook my head. Eleanor knew me far too well.

    “No,” I said.

    “Why are you upset, dear?”

    “The new tenant of Kellynch is Ben Wentworth’s sister.” 

     “The Ben Wentworth? The boy you were almost engaged to?”

     “Yes… the one I was advised not to marry…”

     “Oh Jane, you can’t blame your father for this…”

     “If I remember correctly, he had some backing from you and Liz.”

     “Jane, as your Godmother, being here for you whilst your mother was absent, I would not have been doing my job if I hadn’t advised you to break off that relationship…”

     “As I recall, both you and dad didn’t think he was good enough for me to hang with, let alone marry and… you were both so wrong.” 

     Tears were welling up in my eyes again by then. Though I didn’t want to hurt Eleanor it was obvious I’d carried these emotions for a long time. I was ready to burst at the seams. Since I rarely displayed my feelings or any anger towards my family, Eleanor looked shocked.

    “Oh Jane … in case you hadn’t noticed people who join the military are sent to war. He wanted to be a fighter pilot, if I recall correctly. The fact that he’s invented some computer programme, that’s just a fluke. I believed, I thought, you were not of the personality that could cope with waiting and hoping that a boy would show up for you again after months or years of active duty… His now being wealthy – well, that is just money and lack of it was never the problem from my perspective. I’m so sorry if you misread me.”

    “I would have waited. He graduated as an officer in the Air Force. He starts pilot training after summer. It’s all he’s ever wanted to be. He did everything he said he would do. And look,” I pointed to the newspaper; “he has thrived and survived and graduated top of his class at the academy. Meanwhile I’ve grown pale and washed up and… unwanted.”

    “Oh Jane, that’s not true. You are still as understated and beautiful as you ever were. Sure, you don’t appear in fashion magazines like your sister, but outer beauty fades and is nothing to envy. You are only young. Don’t be silly. Besides, did he ever write? Did he even call you?”

    “No,” I said, “but we did not part… well.” I added, embarrassed to be making something out of what was clearly, nothing.

    “Then how much could this teenage passion have actually meant to him? To encourage you to become engaged to a boy who was going away to train for years in a job where he may see active duty would have been wrong. You would have been throwing yourself away, waiting for him to return…”

    “But I waited for him to return anyway, and now he is here and he’s perfect and… both you and dad said he’d never amount to anything.”

    “But that is surely not the reason you rejected him…”

    “I allowed myself to be persuaded and ever since I made that decision, I have lived to regret it. I have never met any man his equal. It’s true I pushed and he… left but I didn’t think my hesitation would be irrevocable. I didn’t realize he would turn away from me so suddenly and cut off all contact.”

     Eleanor handed me a tissue. I wiped my tears again and sniffed.

     “Anyway, he’s probably married now or engaged. They mostly marry young in his family, also in this family,” I rolled my eyes. “They marry young in the armed forces too and any sane girl would be proud to be an officer’s wife.”

     “Oh Jane, you are the most level-headed girl I know.”

      My Godmother was trying to make me feel better. It was almost working. The feeling of sadness and regret had seeped into my bones. It had nothing to do with Ben’s job, but his success in his chosen career just proved how wrong the people who supposedly loved me were.

     How could I tell Eleanor about my current existence; that when I went to check my new schedule at The Beach Shack, I’d overheard the former Socials (who still met up every week and were now married mothers), gossiping about me.

     “Oh, you know Jane Elliot was once part of our group. She used to hang with that hot pilot guy in the newspaper, Ben Wentworth. Jane was once a cheerleader and her sister was the head of the Socials that year… remember?

   “Oh yeah, I remember. She let him slip through her fingers, though.”

   “I heard he dumped her for someone better looking.”

   “Or was that Serena?” 

   “Yes, Serena Collins. You know, she works as an International Flight Attendant, Who would have thought? She had zero ambition at school, still, waitress in the sky, whatever.

    Anyway, poor Jane, now she has no boyfriend, no prospects and she works in childcare when she’s not waitressing, while we go out for manicures and facials,” Someone sniggered.

     I pretended I couldn’t hear them as I waited casually for my latte but the whole point of their conversation was that I could.

     I turned around as I waited and one of them waved at me.

     I picked up my latte and left.

     That was just my recent humiliation.

     My Godmother had been sitting in silence as I relayed the story. 

    “Well, Jane, those people are small minded and you can always come work with me, you wouldn’t even have to see them.”

     “That’s not the point, Eleanor. I like where I work but if that is what those people, my old school friends, are saying about me, imagine what Ben would think.”

      “I’m not sure, Jane, but I know men aren’t as interested in marital status as women,” Eleanor couldn’t resist this quip. My Godmother picked up my cell and skimmed the headlines as I sat up and smoothed my clothes.

     “I hear you, Eleanor, but he was perfect,” was all I could say.

     Eleanor was silent for a moment. When tears welled up in my eyes again, Eleanor hugged me.

    “Oh Jane, no one is perfect.”

    “He was perfect for me. I know that now,” I sobbed.

     “Oh Jane,” my Godmother tried to console me. “You know of all of your sisters you are the one with the gentle heart and the sweet disposition… and so intelligent and pretty on the outside as well. I just know the perfect man is out there for you.”

    “Yes and his name is Ben.”

    “Jane, in this day and age, you just have to get back out there.”

    At this point, my pale, unsmiling face mocked me from the mirror on the dressing table.

    “I’ve been out there,” I said. “And the real world of dating - it kind of sucks…”

    “You just haven’t met the right man, Jane.”

     By then I’d turned off. I knew my Godmother loved me as I loved her, but I didn’t want to hear another cliché uttered from her lips. I knew she was trying to be helpful. Just like she’d once tried to be helpful before. Now, all I wanted was silence and no reason to ever see Ben again. In a large city like Los Angeles that was highly possible. Wentworth, however, was a tiny seaside town, and it was less likely. Besides, I’d promised Sarah I’d attend the beach bonfire.

    “Jane, cheer up. Guess what? I brought an apple pie. Martha made it.” Eleanor said, luring me to the kitchen with her smile. “You’ve become so thin, Jane, we need to fatten you up.”

    Martha was Eleanor’s housekeeper. If Martha made it, I knew I should have a reason to put a smile on my face, so I did. I knew I was way too old to be feeling sorry for myself or the past. But I wondered. If hesitating in relation to Ben, rejecting him for all intents and purposes, hadn’t been a mistake, wouldn’t someone else have come into my life by now?

      I washed up in the downstairs bathroom and put on some lipstick at Eleanor’s urging. I felt like a little girl again in my father’s house, trying desperately and perhaps hopelessly to impress. It was time for me to stand on my own two feet. Perhaps the financial crisis wasn’t the worst thing that could happen to my family. I dared not say it out loud, but I didn’t get much chance, in any case. Elizabeth and my father gossiped about all the social columns and how they “wouldn’t be seen with so and so for love nor money.” And on and on they went. Work was as good as any excuse, to leave. I grabbed my car keys, said goodbye to everyone and closed the door behind me as I left my father’s house. 

TRULY by Summer Day (inspired by Persuasion) chapter Fifteen: "Tall, Handsome, not a stranger"

Chapter Fifteen

Tall, Handsome, not a Stranger

I knew it was ridiculous, but I persisted in thinking about him. I thought of him on my way to The Beach Shack. I thought of him standing behind the counter. The thought of attending the bonfire party I’d been invited to with my family made my stomach churn. I kept re-reading the newspaper article and wondering, as I worked the morning shift serving coffee, if he’d changed…  Confessions of a Post-teenage Hermit

    My cousin, Keira, had been trying to be an AMW (Actress, Model, Whatever) for about six years now. Keira assured me she was going to do an internet search on Ben after she’d refined her own dating profile.

    Pls don’t, I texted from behind the counter after I’d started to unwrap one of the fortune cookies on a glass jar on the counter. Do not need any more info!

     I glanced at the cookie message: Invitations to socialize are sure to be fun. Accept them! Wow, that’s original, I thought.

     My cell buzzed with Keira’s text, Guess what – he’s not married.

    I know. He has a girlfriend - went to school with her.

    Friend or foe?

    Foe.  I checked.

    Oh, was all I texted, though inside I was elated that he wasn’t married. Of course, if you truly love someone, you are supposed to be happy for their happiness. It doesn’t really work that way though.

      I wiped the counter bench and took in the amazing view of the beach.

      I couldn’t believe how differently I now felt, in comparison to the way I’d been persuaded to feel when I was younger. Now, I’d never listen to anyone. I’d follow my heart without question. My Godmother was right about one thing, though. I needed to get over it. Start hanging with someone else. Start dating again.

     I’d read somewhere that a writer has two choices: to obtain the perfection of a story or the perfection of a life. Neither was possible, of course, but obviously I’d chosen the former, since my life was clearly lacking in love, social connections and job satisfaction, according to everyone else. Besides, I wrote in my blog and I’m not sure I’d define myself as ‘a writer’ because of that. I wasn’t happy, it’s true, but happiness was a choice and I resolved myself to a kind of contentment. Combining working and blogging would not be a wasted summer.

   Working at The Beach Shack was almost as good as summering in Wentworth; and summering in Wentworth was almost as good as living here. Far from the hustle and smog of Los Angeles, the small community had become my own over the commute of recent years.

   Mornings at the café went quickly; there were all the usual joggers and housewives with children and pets. We had a lovely little porch outside where the animals were served treats. This pleased the owners almost as much as the pets. Sometimes parents I knew from school would come in. My students mostly said “hi” and looked excited to see me. Occasionally, they brought me cute little drawings they’d done that I could post on the wall behind the counter dedicated to “Miss Elliot.” These children were also staying here for their summer vacation.  We had that in common, for sure. Other people, like the girls I’d gone to school with, came and went with their families. I did my best to tune out when they smiled to my face and made casually cruel remarks behind my back.

   The former Socials from my junior year, were the only people I wasn’t particularly happy to see. They’d all married young, like Melissa, and moved to Wentworth with their husbands. Their husbands generally worked in Los Angeles during the week which left these ‘ladies’ to lunch together (generally at The Beach Shack – just my luck.)

    On Monday morning, after a hectic weekend, they’d come in for their mother’s meeting and to make pointed comments within earshot of me about “women who’d been left on the shelf.” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I knew for a fact that at least two of the women who pitied unmarried “college drop outs” (like me), had husbands who were being investigated for financial crime and spousal abuse. The husbands of two of the other women regularly came into the café with their girlfriends in the evening when they knew their wives were at home.  

     Most women stayed in abusive relationships for the love of their children or money, or to “keep the family unit together;” but I had to wonder at the hypocrisy that surrounded my peers.  What had happened to their dreams? I knew women were now being encouraged to get their men to “put a ring on it” earlier but the pressure to be part of a couple at any price was verging on ridiculous.  There seemed to be no dignity in being alone in the eyes of the selfish people I met, yet I wondered how much self-respect people like Dana (ex-Social and former friend of Serena’s until Serena stole her twelfth grade boyfriend) really had. Dana’s husband regularly appeared in the Wentworth gossip columns on the arms of other women.

    It was mid-morning and after serving three breakfasts, I was revising a new blog post behind the counter when I looked up to hear my name being called.

   “Jane! Jane!”

    My younger cousins, Lia and Hailee, who were both in their first year at Fashion College, were dressed to the nines in head-to-toe designer clothing. It’s true that they were trust fund bunnies but they also had good value systems and very sensible parents and it was impossible to resent them.

     “Jane, when do you have your break?”

     “Soon.”

     Lia and Hailee both stood in the morning sun looking like they’d just returned from a week in Hawaii (they had). I was used to them interrupting my work days, and glad of it since they were both fun. At eighteen and nineteen, they had none of my hesitation towards the adult human race in general.

    “Oh Jane,” Lia said in a loud voice. So loud in fact that the entire ex-Social mother’s group looked up. “We’ve just been walking Georgie along the beach – he’s outside…” Georgie was their Rottweiler, the opposite of his breed’s reputation, a fierce protector but also a kitty cat with the ladies. His greatest trick was carrying   tennis balls in his mouth – or trying to.   

    “I’ll get him a drink,” Hailee interrupted.

    “Anyway, we practically ran into the guy on the front page of the paper this morning. Ben Wentworth… He’s really hot,” Lia added.

     “It says he went to Hallowed Halls School so we figure you must know him…”

      At this point the mothers’ group swung around in their chairs almost simultaneously. I was pretty sure Dana hadn’t forgotten, but I didn’t want to make a big thing of it.

    “Sure.”

    “Oh, Jane you never told us that.”

    “I knew him way back, you were both still in grade school...We were friends, it was nothing.”

    “Well, he’s staying at the beach house. We saw him out walking with his nephew this morning, along the beach. We got talking and told him about this place so you should expect him to come by.”

     My cheeks went red. I was ashamed that I’d even considered the prospect that after all these years a connection still existed. I even seemed pathetic to myself.

    “He’s not married,” Hailee added mischievously.*

    “Certainly a step up from high school boys,” Lia added enthusiastically.

    “And you know how cute he is,” Hailee added as she came back to sit in front of the counter.

     It was obvious my efforts to avoid him were going to be in vain.  He seemed to be staying in Wentworth and according to Lia, who knew everything about our small community, was now a minor celebrity.

   “Anyway, I got talking to his sister at the store and she mentioned that she’d invited us, the whole family, including you, Jane, to her bonfire party tonight. Apparently the decorations and catering are going to be quite extravagant because it’s also a party to celebrate her brother’s graduation from Officer Training School.”

    At this point, Tom Winchester entered the coffee shop. He looked like he’d been out for an early morning swim. He also looked hungry.

    “I gotta go,” I whispered to Hailee, reminded of the fortune cookie.

TRULY by Summer Day (inspired by Persuasion) chapter Sixteen: "Man in the cafe"

Chapter Sixteen

Man in the Café

I picked up another fortune cookie from the pile in a bowl on the countertop. This is what it said: A tall handsome newcomer with links to the past is a sure thing. I’d earmarked Tom Winchester for Liz and had resolved to play matchmaker. They shared the same good looks, the same questionable values - they were, without a doubt, a perfect match… Confessions of a Post-teenage Hermit

     After they left the room I went over to the new guy only to see up close, that it was Tom Winchester, who’d briefly dated Liz at school and still held a torch for her if his occasional emails and conversations with me were anything to go by.

    “Good morning, Tom,” I said in my happy waitress way.

    He looked up at me and smiled. His looks had improved along with his personality over the years.

    “Hi Jane,” he replied, “I’d like coffee please and… an egg-white omelette, oh and maybe you could tell me the rules on how to get your sister Liz to become exclusive.”

    Obnoxious. Whatever.

    When I took him over his plate, he explained he was helping a friend, a director at one of the studios, who was scouting for locations nearby. He asked me about the properties that dotted the coast. His friend needed to hire one, if possible, to shoot some location scenes.  

  “As you know, I grew up here,” I said. “And this promenade is the best stretch of real estate in the area,” I said wistfully. I had a sneaking suspicion he hadn’t heard about the family finances. 

   “I have no idea why you work here, Jane. I’m sure your dad could have found you somewhere better. By the way, do you think Liz would know any good real estate agents in the area?”

   “Well… actually, Liz finds properties for friends…”

   He looked at me closely.

   “Do you think I would qualify?” Tom had been in New York working as a stockbroker. I knew this because he’d always stayed in touch with both Liz and me. He’d told me on more than one occasion he was “so into” my sister. Too much information, Tom, but he wouldn’t stop talking about her until I’d agreed to help them get together.

     It was obvious how much he liked her.

   “Okay,” he replied. “Please ask Liz to call my office since I’ve tried to get her card before and she wouldn’t give it to me.”

    I was kind of floored. 

    “Uh… okay,” I smiled.

    “Actually, Jane, I was hoping you’d help play matchmaker.”

    “I said I would and I meant it, Tom. You and Liz are made for each other.”

     He smiled. I wanted to add… that’s if you like vipers, ‘cos I was pretty sure Liz had had Tom’s measure since high school. But then Liz always said, “Like attracts like.”

     Me? I’d always had this rule not to chase boys but it seemed all the social laws had changed in my absence from the dating game. I smiled and pocketed his card. I had an idea a surface friendship with Tom might actually prove useful in some way. He wasn’t my type but let’s face it, his obsession with finance would make him perfect for Liz and she could show him as many properties as he wanted.

     I heard my cousins tittering as they came out of the bathroom where they’d changed from swimsuits into street clothes.

      As I showed my cousins the door and promised to meet them for lunch and to go to the bonfire party (I couldn’t believe I was considering this but it was better than putting off the inevitable), they too left an invitation for me on the counter and added smiley faces.

   “Look at all the new talent in town this summer,” Lia whispered.

   I looked at her and paused.

   “He’s interested in Liz.”

   “Did he go to the same high school as you and Ben Wentworth?”

   “Hailee, you gotta stop mentioning Ben. I haven’t seen him in six years. It is highly unlikely he even remembers me, but, yes, Tom did go to the same high school; and you’re right, I can’t spend my life avoiding Ben. He’s on my turf now.”

   “Oh, Jane, everyone remembers you… you’re special.”

   I shrugged. Today I felt plain, bland and not very special. It was moments like this with my adorable cousins that were gold, and kept me in Wentworth where I belonged.

   “Lia’s right,” Hailee added, “You are especially smart and very pretty… and kind inside which is the most important thing of all. See you at eight tonight, Jane.”

    “Okay.”

    I smiled at my younger cousins. I’d spent years babysitting them and our bond was close and true. They waved girlishly as they left the café and I wondered if I’d ever feel as light and happy as them again. Probably not, but then maybe I wasn’t meant to. Maybe I’d grown up, a lot.

TRULY by Summer Day (inspired by Persuasion) chapter Seventeen: "That Night"

Chapter Seventeen

That Night

As I drove over to my sister Melissa’s house after work, I was filled with anticipation for the evening. It would be better to meet him again, on my terms, than to face him unexpectedly…

Confessions of a Post-teenage Hermit

    When I arrived at Melissa’s house in Venice Beach, Melissa’s husband, Fred, greeted me warmly.

    He came outside to help me move the last of my boxes out of the trunk of my car. They’d been there for a day now and Melissa had promised to store them since my closet at Dad’s was overflowing.

    Fred was an average looking guy with an easy going personality and, I’ll admit it, a kind heart. His family were loaded so he’d managed to avoid Dad’s wrath, but beyond the family money, Fred was a normal and hardworking guy.  Melissa admitted that everything “average” about him (apart from his earnings as director of a Gaming Startup), made things easier for her. His personal traits (humbleness and a lack of vanity) allowed Missy to act superior in every way.

    In fact, I’d seen Melissa boss poor Fred around in a way that made me look away. He seemed to be under her spell, and worked every extra hour to please her. Nothing was too much trouble, though Melissa was never anything more than ungrateful. I wasn’t surprised they were having problems. Ordering him to help me out, when he would have no doubt offered anyway, had less to do with helping me than once again asserting her authority.

    “That’s the last of the boxes, Jane,” Fred said as he wiped his hands on his pockets after loading them into the store room at the back of the garage.

    Fred had always had a soft spot for me, going so far as to ask me out before he had ever shown interest in Melissa. We’d gone out once, but instantly, we both knew we’d make better friends. My Godmother had been accurate in her assessment on that occasion stating, “two natures as easy going as yours and Fred’s would be a pathway to a bad match.” Eleanor then encouraged me to introduce Fred to Melissa, which I was pleased to do.  It was ironic, of course, that instead of thanking me for finding her the man she would marry, she now looked down on me for having no one of my own; and she always seemed nervous about leaving the two of us alone together; as if anything would happen; ever.

   “Melissa just has her nose out of joint because Fred liked you first,” Eleanor assured me. I wasn’t so sure.

    “At least Fred’s sincere,” Melissa said. “I think he might just be the right man for me…” Melissa had commented at the time, “I’ve always thought you needed someone dashing and handsome, Jane, like a character from one of those stupid novels you read.” 

     Melissa was in love with love; Melissa was ready to have children and Melissa thought Fred would make a good husband. Dad gave them his blessing, as if they needed it. Although Fred appeared both average and a little dull, his family were fiercely connected to one of the richest and most powerful in Beverly Hills. In other words, both he and Elizabeth approved of my sister’s match. 

    Missy had reached the conclusion that Fred was perfect for her only one week before the scheduled wedding. During the rehearsal, Elizabeth, who was quite cynical about marriage kept Tom at a distance (even though he’d been interested in her since high school) but I remember seeing them holding hands and talking in a corner when everyone else was dancing. Elizabeth had been complaining to me that we stood out that day in our relatively unfashionable dresses, “like the unpicked fruit on the cherry tree.” I laughed, but it was true. Liz was still mortified that Melissa had insisted on putting us in what she described as, “bridesmaid’s dresses designed to make us look like the ugly stepsisters.”

    “Never mind Liz,” I agreed. “It’s Melissa’s questionable right as the bride to ensure she looks better than everyone else.”

    Liz refused to pose for the photographs until I persuaded her that it was Missy’s big day and there was no point in ruining it. My sisters clashed with each other even more than they did with me.

    That night, Fred had taken my belongings and locked them in Missy’s storage cabinet with his usual good grace.

    “You know you can always come and stay with us… anytime. Not just for the week,” Fred said. “You are a sister to me, Jane. We’d love to have you.”

    “Thanks Fred,” I smiled.

     I was glad I’d decided to attend the bonfire party with my family. In a way I’d save face with Ben, show him the past meant nothing to me, either. It wouldn’t be easy to avoid running into him at some point in Wentworth if he was staying all summer. Better to be the one controlling the conditions under which we met.

    I sat on the couch as Liz complained about her life while her toddler kept trying to chew her designer shoe. Earlier that morning, my father had tried to convince me to “give up the waitress job” and go to work with Elizabeth. “When the finances are free from the sale, you could enrol in night school… get an education.”

     That was how I learnt what I’d already suspected. After summer, they intended to sell Kellynch. The Crofts would move out and the high season would be over. A sale after the immediate cash of high season, would be the answer to everyone’s problems – except mine.

    “I already have part of a college education father,” I reminded him, in a rare moment of speaking up for myself, “and I got good grades, remember?”

    I had spoken back to Dad as a child and been greeted by the back of his hand on one occasion, but time heals most things, except that I knew his nature and it hadn’t changed.

    As my sister got up to dress for the party, she pulled the shoe off my nephew, Max, a little too fast and he started crying, toppling over in an instant onto his child sized truck which ran over his foot. Melissa was hushing him as she re-applied her lipstick and ran to get her coat.

    As she cleaned the child up in the bathroom and re-applied her lipstick she called out to me, “You know he’s with someone, don’t you?”

    “Who?”

    “That guy you used to like, the one who rented Kellynch along with his sister; Ben Wentworth.”

    “I didn’t know his name was on the lease.”

    “Oh, it was, he enquired about the place in the first instance, as it turns out.”

    “Great,” I replied, meaning not so great.

     “Of course, we didn’t even remember who he was, he’s changed a lot. He had a girlfriend with him. At first I didn’t recognise her then it turns out she used to go to school with us. I could barely remember her or Ben for that matter but they both remembered you and Liz. Anyway, now Serena works for a big international airline.”

   “Wow,” I said.

   “Really? Is that all you have to say?”  Melissa was concerned she hadn’t had the emotional response she expected from me.

    By then, I was in the process of leaving, to go outside and wait for my cousins who were due to arrive at any moment. I’d shut the door quietly behind me. Of course I was upset but it was inevitable he’d be with someone. Men like Ben would not need to be alone for long, but Serena Collins? Had he lost his mind? 

    Whilst Fred waited patiently outside, he’d allowed the other twin to climb the tree that overlooked the front porch. The child was actually climbing down the trunk as his foot became stuck. Then, as Harry moved to his father’s arms, he fell on his head and scraped both his face and knee in the short fall to the ground.

    I cradled Harry as he screamed all the way home from the paediatricians who pronounced him fine except for a slight shock. Melissa was told to “keep a close eye on him all night.”

    The party wasn’t due to start until nine and Melissa had a miserable look on her face as we arrived back in Venice Beach and settled Max and Harry in bed. She was still dressed in her finest designer clothes and ready to party.

    “Melissa darling,” Fred said, “we should stay with him.”

    “Both of us? Stay home?” Melissa asked incredulously after checking little Harry’s head and noting that he slept soundly.

    Melissa spoke softly as she shut the door to the nursery. “Are you kidding, Fred? I’ve been at home all day – you try it. I cannot believe you were stupid enough not to keep a proper eye on the children…” 

     “But Missy, I’ve cancelled the babysitter and you gave the nanny the night off.”

     My sister’s voice was ringing in my ears… and an image of Ben’s face was etched in my mind. Perhaps it was just an excuse to avoid him, I’m not really sure, but suddenly I had an idea.

   “It’s alright Missy, I’ll stay with the boys tonight. I have your contact details.”

    “Oh, no, Jane …” my brother-in-law said. “We would never impose on you…”

     “Oh, Jane loves children. It’s no imposition, Fred. Jane has far better childcare qualifications than any babysitter. Are you sure, Jane?” Melissa asked.

    “Yes,” I replied. “You go, Melissa, It’ll be fine.”

     “Well, you have the most experience at looking after children really, of anyone. I’m sure the twins are safer in your care. I feel almost useless in this situation and probably would be better off out of it,” Melissa added.  

     After they’d left, I sat on the sofa and turned on the television.

     I’d avoided almost every social occasion in recent years. There was always a good reason, and this one was the best. The truth was, I never thought I’d see Ben again. And now, I didn’t want to.

     I got off the couch and turned up the baby monitor as I made myself some hot chocolate. A part of me was overwhelmed by my sister’s self-centredness (but I was used to it). Always, as the girl without a boyfriend, I was left out, devalued and discarded socially and by my family. But secretly, I was glad about tonight. If I had any say in the matter, I’d never have to see Ben Wentworth again.